my 39 week appointment

was yesterday and I think it went very well. My midwife is so full of knowledge and she makes things make sense. LOL Some Drs. try and answer your questions but the do it in terms that you can not understand, but midwives are just so different.

I gained 4 pounds in 6 days, and she wanted to know if I wanted to be checked and I was so happy to say yes. The reason I have really been wanting to get checked is because I have been having so many Braxton Hicks along with some good contractions so I knew for sure that I had to be at lease 2 or 3 cm dilated. Well, I was only 1cm and 50% effaced and a -2 station. So needless to say I was a little disappointed. I know its progress but I thought I would be a lot further along. Well, I could barely walk after she checked me, it really hurt. So at about 7pm last night I decided to go soak in the tub and I was actually in there for over an hour. It felt so good and I just dreaded getting up and moving. Well I had to, the pruny look does not look good on me....... So I head right to bed and WOW was it hard to get comfortable. No matter how I laid I hurt. So after about an hour or so I get up to go to the bathroom and I let out a big scream. My hips, legs and "you know" hurt so bad, all I could do is start to cry, and I cried and cried and cried for a few hours it seemed. I cried out to God and prayed that he would put me in labor because I can not deal with this pain anymore. I came downstairs to cry some more, where it was more comfortable, and pray some more.. Well, I finally decided to go back up to bed to get some rest and well really didn't get much last night, I laid awake with this tighting in my stomach and every time it did, I kept wondering, is this it? I finally fell asleep at about 5 this morning and woke up the same exact way, in pain........ Since I woke up I had a couple of contractions that were pretty bad but now nothing. I did however go to the bathroom (Sorry TMI) this morning and well, I had the bloody show, so we shall see......

One thing, If I am still pregnant this time next week, I will be going in on Friday to have them insert the Gel......... But I am really praying that I don't have to do that. I really want to go ALL NATURAL.....